Observations Upon A Spider

I’ve gone from squashing bugs to observing them, and it’s been a big improvement. For one thing, I’ve gone from feeling I am at war with the outside world to feeling I’m at peace with it. Perhaps we prefer squashing rather than observing because we too much resemble them and fear what they could teach us about ourselves. Or perhaps they are too different from us and observing them brings us too far out of our comfort zone. There has to be some reason people fly to other continents to shoot giraffes.

I’m watching a spider today at my work and it amazes me that he knows how to be a spider. He’s a craftsman who’s never had to serve an apprenticeship, creating an elaborate web without a blueprint. The knowledge has been imparted to him somehow through his DNA. This alone has to make people pause and consider what they think they know to be true about intelligence.

I would like to know about his history. I’m sure it’s more interesting than that of many people who have told me their life story at the drop of a hat. What would induce a spider to set up web in my small little corner of the planet? How far has he travelled and what made this “the spot”?

Having spun his web, he sits patiently, restfully, not moving a muscle. If spiders have what we would call muscles.

The web is vast and he sit in the center of it. If spiders are capable of such a thing, I imagine he is proud of his accomplishment: his main web is joined by a side-web, as if to outdo the other spiders in the neighborhood.

What he is, he is utterly, never for a moment wondering if he made the right career choice. Never once has he contemplated reassignment surgery. He knows nothing about regret. At work he is diligent, at rest, he is still as a statue. When his meal arrives he never feels like he has to tear himself away from the TV but goes about his dinner unreservedly.

And being at work, I can’t help thinking that he has never known the feeling of a boss looking over his shoulder, though I sense he regards my attention suspiciously. In short, he is living the life he was born to lead more completely than 99% of human beings. He does what he wants to do, never once subjugating his own motivations out of a concern of what other spiders might think. Never once has he woken to the sound of an alarm signaling it was time to build a web. I cannot help but feel a certain envy of this spider, of his independence and his ability to live life to the fullest. I understand now the desire some have to squash such creatures.