My Love Affair And Ugly Breakup With Twinkie The Kid

Hostess and I go way back. I used to have a thing for her. Hostess had my preferred snacks, the pleasant surprises I would sometimes find in my lunch box. Times were good when my parents could afford Hostess. A Hostess product was a status symbol for children too young to know what a status symbol was. I don’t know of any stories of kids being beaten up for their Ding Dongs the way they were for their Nikes a decade later, but it wouldn’t surprise me if it happened. They’d have been in for a scrap if anyone ever tried to take mine from me, though.